A while ago, the lovely La Belette Rouge tagged me for a Scrappy Do - or a little me ME about myself.
There are also a few "sevens" going around in the blogworld so consider this hitting two birds with one stone. Seven useless things about me. (as if you were interested?)
1. I own several bras with a pink ribbon on one side that says "Push up."
These are meant to be removed upon purchase but I left them on and when I wear them I pretend I have just won an award for "great boobs."
Who would present this award and pin it to my bra? I don't know, maybe the mayor. But it gives me a "lift" (ha ha) most mornings and I don't want to take 'em off. Call it an affirmation.
2. I buy most of my clothes in Charity Shops and Recycled Clothing Stores where previously rich but now ever so slightly broke people sell their clothes on consignment.
I do this because
A) I'm a tightarse and I refuse to be exploited by ridiculous retail aspirational mark-ups
B) I don't want to wear what everyone else is wearing and these clothes are more individual than high street mass produced fashions
C) I genuinely believe in the mantra of Reduce, Reuse and Recycle.
Reduce meaning more expensive, better made, non-mass produced garments. Re-use means wear it for longer and Recycle meaning donate it so I can buy it.
D) I am too old to be worrying what size I am in relation to "off the rack" and if a charity/recycle item don't fit, put it back and try something else. There is no bigger size on the rack to torment you into thinking you should have bigger boobs, smaller bum, longer legs. Move on.
E) When people lose weight they keep their fat clothes. When they gain weight they donate/sell their gorgeous couture or pret a porter designer label lovelies because they can't bear to have them sitting in their wardrobe taunting them.
I am 5' 4", 8 1/2 stone and your shit might fit me.
And F) If I get buyers remorse, I donate it back. Everybody wins.
3. I can't stand the "trying shit on and tormenting yourself every morning" thing. So I try and have whatever theme I'm liking available in quantity. That means if I am into business shirts and little secretary skirts - I have 4 fitted shirts and two skirts ready to wear.
If I am doing flippy dresses over long sleeved Tees and tights - then there is a choice of dresses and a drawer full of tights and identical tees.
I had a friend with me today while I topped up my wool mix tights for the first time in 3 years. She was wearing her glasses so helpfully spotted sizes while I picked out 6 pairs in one go. Last year it was tees. I don't piss about. Need it, get it. Have it when you need it.
My flippy dress thing is coming from St Vincents on Church Road Greystones. My long boot thing was Hilfigger and "Wear it Again" on Baggot Street. The Secretary Skirt thing was T.M. Lewin. Follow a theme, get dressed, get on with life.
4. I like to laugh. Sure I get angry, I kick and I throw things. Yes I get tearful and eat a lot of chocolate around the 3rd week of every month. But I really like to laugh. So I try to surround myself with funny people.
For some reason I am chemically optimistic. If I can't laugh with you then I will mock you and laugh at you. It's better for the complexion.
5. I am a largely self taught nerd. I will as someone once said, take on most things and try to do them, even if I am shit at it.
However since most people don't even attempt it I appear to be proficient.
Until I am with a real nerd and they show me up. They probably mock me. That's why they appear to be so young. All that laughing.
6. I like champagne (who knew?) I would rather make a meal out of whatever is left in the cupboard and fridge and buy a bottle of Tesco Champagne, than order a curry and drink crappy wine. It is the only drink you can have in excess and still look beautiful in the morning. I have never had a champagne puke or hangover. And I stayed in the Moët Chateau de Saran in Epernay. I had champagne for breakfast, lunch, entree, dinner, dessert and after dinner drinks.
If anyone wants me to test me on this, email me. Your Shout.
staunch, steadfast, steady and unwavering enemy. Don't cross me because I will not forget it. But if you are my friend and I can help you. I will. xx